Apr 14, 2005

Tough Decisions...

So after days and weeks of angst, last night I told Mike he had to make a decision (about the PMF options) by 9 p.m. and since I knew he would instantly regret it, he could change it again at 9 in the morning if he wanted, but then he was stuck with the decision. He chose EPA, and he seems to be sticking with it. So now we just wait for the offer letter, which could take up to 45 days. So we'll see what happens.

As for the move, we have been talking more and more about commuting so that we can be back in Philadelphia sooner versus later. I think I was excited about moving to DC and out of Charlottesville when I just wanted to get out of the “country” and into the urban environment. But after looking for places and talking to people, DC is more and more obviously not somewhere I want to be or settle. Plus, I am really sad about leaving the house – I feel like I am in mourning about it. I cried all afternoon yesterday. Partly because this house was what I got out of the whole move to Charlottesville – it was my thing. Now its gone and things are completely up in the air and I feel like I am standing on a pile of loose rocks.

I hate the idea of being apart 4 days a week but we would have done it anyway if I was still working at UVA Hospital, and it would be much harder from Charlottesville given that there is no regular train service (it comes through once a day only and its inconsistent). I still don’t like it, but I do like the idea that we could rent something in Philadelphia until we find a house to buy and I can get back to having my own life and career a bit sooner. Plus if we do that it will only be for about a year and then he can rotate into the Philadelphia EPA office for the last 6 months of his fellowship and then look for work in the area. So we'll see. That's this week's idea. Molly inspired me to think creatively and I realized that we could spend the same amount of money on renting a place in Philly and a room in DC (300/month) and I would be a lot happier because I could "get started" on my life again. Of course, I have no idea what I want to do but I could figure it out better if I were somewhere I knew I was staying for a while.


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